From Hunter To The Hunted

"It is the L-rd who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed."

~ Deuteronomy 31:8

Often in life it feels like there are more enemies than friends. And to add to the already stressful situations we often face our friends can feel a bit like enemies. So much so in fact that we even have common sayings expressing such sentiment. It is almost enough to make even the strongest of us just decide to toss in the towel and walk away. 

For the faithful it can be even worse when we set out to follow our faith on a daily basis. We tend to surround ourselves with those of a similar mindset. Yet we are often drawn out of our comfort zones and forced into situations that rapidly become combative. And in the blink of an eye we find ourselves acting out like a scared animal... taking swipes at whomever or whatever we reach out toward. 

It is easy for us to look back on situations like these when they have passed us by. We can see the dogs for what they are. And we can see ourselves for what we had become. 

Most of the time this is the hardest part of emulating the spirit of G-d and how He would have us act. This is the part where we have to realize that we aren't always the lion we would like to imagine. This is where we have to see the fearful beast that takes over when we can't give up the fight... give up the power. 

I myself am quick to show my teeth, so to speak. Like the lion, I bristle my hair and growl. And with the noble beast's pride, I rarely back away from a fight. Its this tenacity that allows me to do the work I feel I have been given. Its this spirit that gives me the strength to deal with the work I do on Alder's Ledge (link is somewhere here on this blog). 

The down side to this is the tendency to bite and ask questions later. 

Looking back it is easy to identify when that first blow was landed. You can almost spot the very moment you make contact with the wrong person. And yet not matter how hard you wish you hadn't, you can see in that very instant when you turn a friend into a foe. Those are the moments you wish you could take back. Those are the words, the actions, and the emotions you wish you could have just had one more second to think about before they occurred. 

But the moment passes. The fight usually subsides. And the wounds often heal. 

The reason this is the hardest part of living in the way G-d has shown to us is that this is the part where we lean upon H-m. 

Given the chance to run away we often do just that. Other times we take the opportunity to open old wounds and simply fight back some more. These are such natural reactions to us that we even identify it as a the "fight or flight" response. Yet G-d calls upon us to do the most unnatural of things instead. 

Surrender. 

G-d tells us that if we surrender our own will to fight of our own strength He will provide for us and make our way in a path of H-s choosing. All we have to do is give up the power and relent the battle to H-m. This is a response that calls for a greater level of trust in H-m rather than the hope that He will forgive us later. It calls upon us to have faith that G-d will deliver justice in the end. It calls upon us to turn onto G-d what is H-s to begin with. 

The battles we often face in life are trivial. The battles we face in our spiritual life however can have ramifications of which we have no ability to fully understand. The irony is that more often than not we choose to throw in the towel and offer a few muttered words to G-d over the trivial while bullheadedly refusing to give up upon the most significant battles we face. This is how we are often lured into situations where we almost instantly go from being the hunter to being the hunted. 

As believers in G-d we are cast into a struggle not our own. We are made to fight when it is least convenient and made to stand down when we would rather not. Our enemies already know that. That is why the lure is set in the first place. That is why it is used over and over again. 

When we take to showing our teeth and preparing to fight we should readily seek G-d. Through H-s guidance we can more easily identify when the battle is of our will or of H-s. If we seek H-m first we can do less looking back upon mistakes and spend more time praising H-s name.

"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

~ Hebrews 4:16